Changes
by WooHoo
Summary: Max found things had changed, whether she wanted it or not!! - M/A - I do not own Dark Angel or their characters in any shape or form
1. Changes

Changes  
  
Chapter One  
  
  
  
It had been a strange and very painful 6 months since Manticore had been destroyed. First coming back from the dead or so Logan had thought, then nearly killing him with a kiss. Manticore had being fucking up my life since the day I was born and even before that. But this was something different; the virus they implanted in me, to trap then kill Logan was something else. The pains of being near him and unable to touch him in case I killed him, it was more than I could stand most days. Then the whole White and familiar's thing, need I go on, and then there was Alec. He had been the thorn in my side since he had walked in my cell that day back at Manticore. Announcing that he was my breeding partner, I soon let him know how I felt about that, remembering that scene did bring a little smile to my face. Oh, lets not forget him trying to kill Joshua & me, and giving up my one chance of getting rid of the virus to save his fucking arse. You'd think when I told him that I didn't want to see his sorry arse again; he'd get the clue. But not Alec, he gets a job at Jam Pony, not to start a new life, but to get a, all sectors pass to carry on his cat burglar life, god what is it about that bloke that drives me mad…  
  
I knew what it was, he reminded me of me, well of how I used to be, I'd changed; I was a better person now! When I looked it him, I Saw what I really was, a killer. I, I saw Ben. I saw how Ben used to be when we at Manticore, the gentle, loved one, I saw the murderer he had turned into, and I saw him dead lying in my arms after I had snapped his neck. I saw myself saving my own arse from Lydecker & his Manticore goons. And because of that, I gave him a hard time; I ripped into him every chance I got. It didn't matter how many missions he went on for Eyes only with me, or that he had saved my arse a few times. I just couldn't help myself. He was so fucking cocky, so confident so… Alec. I watched him in Crash with the girls all over him, god it seemed to get to me. If I admitted it, I was jealous that he was getting some and I wasn't and of course we know whose fault that was…  
  
Then things changed, then, there was Rachel! Whole of that business, made me see a side of Alec I didn't know about. I will never forget him holding Rachel and crying, it actually broke my heart to see it. I even offered to be there to talk to if he needed,but Alec being Alec didn't need to talk because he was fine. I remembered what Joshua had said,  
  
"Alec is all Trick and treats on the outside but underneath, confused and in turmoil"  
  
I asked Joshua what was Alec was confused about  
  
"Manitcore" he had replied  
  
So I let him be, it was easier for me, I didn't have to be near him. To have to look into his face, into those eyes, they may be a different colour to Ben's but they were the same eyes…  
  
~ ~ ~  
  
  
  
Then it happened again, I infected Logan. We were in Crash; I had been talking to Alec, he had just told Asha that he didn't think they should see each other again. Then he was trying to tell me why.  
  
"Max, we don't belong with them. We're a danger to them. When are you going to finally see that"  
  
I knew what Alec was getting at, whole Logan & me situation. I told him straight  
  
"Mind his own business"  
  
He started to argue back but that's when Logan had come up and asked what was going on, I told him nothing and I was heading home, I was tired, then he grabs my arm. Next thing he is on the floor, finding it hard to breath. When we got to the hospital, they had done their tests; the only thing that could save him was a blood transfusion from a transgenic. I couldn't give blood so I called Alec and he said 15 minutes, 15 minutes my arse no fucking sign of him. I had to call Joshua in the end and he came straight over and Logon was fine, he was more than fine, he was fucking lucky.  
  
I wasn't, I was so mad with Logan for being so stupid and the way he grabbed me, and it was like he was jealous? I was mad with Alec for not showing up, he knew it was life and death. But one thing I learned was, I couldn't go through this again. I did it over the phone so I wouldn't have to look at him, the coward's way, he knew what was coming and tried to keep talking so I couldn't say it. But I did, I told him I couldn't go though that again. I was also pissed with him over it and because of him I have to feel even guiltier then I already do. It was for the best, it had to be this way, he didn't like it but tough.  
  
I found out the next day why Alec didn't turn up, sector cops had arrested him for murder. Well fuck him, he made his bed, he could lay in it.  
  
OC asked me." Why you, not going to help your boy"  
  
I told her straight "he ain't my boy"  
  
"Stop bullshitting me and go help Alec out and see what's up Boo"  
  
She's the only one that can straighten me out, actually made me feel bad. So I went to see him in the police station, pretending to be his lawyer. Found out, that not only had he been ID by this dead guy's wife, they also had DNA proof that Alec was the killer. Well I was so fucking angry at him, that when they let me see him, I told him that I was going to leave him there for White and that I regretted ever letting him out of Manticore. God, his face when I said that, it really took me back,  
  
1 "Max do you really believed that I would kill in cold blood"  
  
I replied "yes"  
  
"Do you really think that I would kill some guy and then pull his teeth out afterwards"  
  
Just then I had a flash back to Ben, and that second I knew Alec was innocent, just then a cop walked in, I took him out with one elbow. Alec didn't even have to be told, he was up and out of his chair, and following me out the door. Before you knew it, we're hanging off a drainpipe being shot at by sector police. All in a nights work!  
  
We finally got back to my place and finally someone spoke, it was Alec  
  
2 "What made you believe me"?  
  
3 "Because it was Ben who killed that man"  
  
Alec's just stared at me so, I had to tell him the truth, truth about Ben and the people he had killed and that I had killed him and saved my own arse.  
  
4 "Max, I'm sorry"  
  
Then he did the funniest thing, he gave me a hug. I'd just told him how I had killed his twin and he was hugging me. God I have to admit it felt good being hugged, just the touch by another human, it was nice. We talked for hours that night about Manticore and Ben, what he was like and how he made all of us in our unit feel loved.  
  
He talked of what happen after the breakout and how things had got worse, the brain washing, beatings and much, much worse. I felt comfortable with Alec for the first time, the next day when I headed for work, I had the feeling he really didn't want to leave me, I asked him where he was heading.  
  
5 "I going to stay at Joshua's for a while"  
  
6 "He'll like that"  
  
7 "Max, thanks for last night"  
  
"Anytime"  
  
"No Max, thanks for letting me know"  
  
"Thanks for, well you know, listening and understanding" I stared at the ground  
  
8 "If I am honest, that's why I give you such a hard time, cos you look like Ben"  
  
He could see that I was in pain just thinking about Ben, so he came up and hugged me  
  
9 "Ever thought it might be because, I'm such a pain is the ass"  
  
He made me smile and I playfully pushed him away, unbeknownst to us Logan had watched whole of this scene from across the road. Of course he got the wrong idea, and I didn't let him think any different, it was the only way to keep Logan at a distant that was safe for both of us. It upset me to see him like that, I had never seen him drunk before and the whole trying to stop me from leaving, to tell the truth it sends a shiver through me when I think of it.  
  
My relationship with Alec and Logan changed after that night. For a long while it was hard to talk or even be around Logan, I still did missions for Eyes Only and as time passed I found it easier being near him. I knew he still wanted more but I was a realist I knew until the virus was gone, there was no use. I didn't matter that I still loved him; it didn't matter that he still loved me. It was the way it had to be for now!!…  
  
  
  
This is my first ever FF please be gentle. I am also dyslexic, so if there are some really weird spelling mistakes, I apologise now!!! I would appreciate constructive reviews, and if you can see ways to improve the layout, I would very much like to hear from you. 


	2. Guilt & Anger

I do not own DA or any of the characters etc etc. Hail to JC  
  
  
  
Chapter 3: Guilt  
  
Things had been calm for a few months; Logan & I were being cool. Alec & I had even become friends, we worked together and even partied together but lately he seem to bring out the bitch in me again!!  
  
OC had even pulled me up one night at Crash  
  
"What's up, Boo"?  
  
"What do you mean"? I said, as I was finishing a beer  
  
"I Mean, what's up"?  
  
"Nothing" I said  
  
"Hey, your fine, so fine you had to rip in to your boy earlier for no reason" Pulling her usual I know your lying face  
  
"He's not my boy and I didn't rip into him"  
  
"Then why you, beating down on him, when ever he opens his mouth"  
  
I had to admit I had been on Alec's back for a while now, but I couldn't say why.  
  
"I don't know," I said as I stared at my glass  
  
"You still mad about the virus thing with Logan" her voice softening  
  
"Well, I'll never be alright with it, but it's not that"  
  
"Then what"? Her voice rising a little  
  
"Well, I think it's to do with" I stopped myself from finishing what I was saying  
  
"With what Boo" Her voice not only softened this time but she moved my face to look at her  
  
"Nothing"  
  
"Look Boo, I ain't goanna push you, but lay off him a bit, yer" Concern in her face for me, not so much for Alec.  
  
"Yer"  
  
"Another beer Boo" About to grab my glass  
  
"No, I am heading off in 10" Putting my hand over the glass  
  
See ya at home" OC said as she was getting off her stool  
  
"Yer, have fun"  
  
"Always, Boo" OC winked and headed over to a tall blond. That did bring a smile to my face; OC was always working the ladies!  
  
I knew OC was right and I knew it wasn't Alec's fault either… It was me. I had got to close to Alec, so close that I had been having dreams about him!! And I didn't like it, I loved Logan and I should only be dreaming about Logan. Well I did in some dreams, but even they had been changing lately. I would be with Logan, but then half way through the dream, he would change into Alec. It was always the same, Logan & me together in his apartment, candles, dinner, music and wine. We would dance together; gently touch and kiss, then when we moved to the bedroom, and when the real passion starts to set in, he turns in to Alec. Every god dame time, just as I was thinking about this, Alec walks up  
  
"Hey, Max"  
  
"What do you, want?" I snapped. I didn't want him to see I was blushing.  
  
"Sorry I bothered" He snapped back  
  
He started to say something else "I don't know what's…. oh, Just forget about it" And he walked away, before I could say anything.  
  
I saw him walk over to Sketchy, I could also see Sketchy asking Alec, what was up, they both looked back at me.  
  
God Max, pull yourself together, it isn't his fault you're having dreams about him. I needed to go for a ride, which always helped calm me down. I grabbed my jacket and headed for the door, I swear I could feel Alec's eyes follow me, but I didn't look back just in case.  
  
I drove for hours and it felt good, by time I got home I actually felt tied. OC was already a sleep by the time I got home, so I settled in for another night of dream filled sleep…  
  
  
  
This continued for another week or so. I couldn't take it anymore; my mood was only getting worse. So that night I sat down with OC and told her everything.  
  
"So, you been having wet dreams about ya boy"  
  
"He's nooot my boy" I couldn't stress that enough  
  
"And they are not wet" I corrected her  
  
"And this is the reason you, keep bitching him"  
  
"Yer" Feeling just a little embarrassed having to admit that  
  
"Why Boo, it ain't his fault, you lusting after his body," She said with a smile  
  
"I am not lusting after his body"  
  
"So having dreams about fucking the arse off him every night, don't mean that"? She laughed  
  
"No, it just means I haven't had it in a very long time!!"  
  
"So you can't be dreaming about getting busy with Logan instead"  
  
"That's it, I do dream of Logan, well that's how it starts out"  
  
"Explain Boo" OC looking very interested  
  
"Ok, its me and Logan, music, wine and slow dancing right, but" I stopped  
  
"But what"  
  
"As things get more… you no"  
  
"Down and dirty" OC said with a bigger smile than before  
  
I pulled a face" Passionate"  
  
"I preferred, down and dirty" OC, being honest  
  
"Do you want to help or not"?  
  
"Alright, Passionate, then what"  
  
"Well, that's when Logan turns in to Alec"  
  
"Oh, I get it Boo" Nodding her head  
  
"Get what"?  
  
"I get, that Logan is the wine and romance in ya dream"  
  
"Yer, and"  
  
"Alec is the down and dirty, don't ya see Boo"  
  
"See what"? Not sure I really wanted to hear what she was about to say  
  
"Ya got, the hots for your Boy" She said this slowly making sure she stressed hots  
  
"He's not my… What are you saying"?  
  
"Boo, you find Alec a turn on, and that's cool"  
  
"No it's not, and I don't" Trying to sound convincing  
  
"Then you explain it" OC Looking me straight in my eyes  
  
"I can't" I sighed deeply, I knew she was right  
  
"That's why you keep bitching at him, you feel guilty"  
  
"I know," I moaned "I shouldn't have any sort of feelings for anyone other than Logan"  
  
"Boo, your not with Logan now"  
  
"I know, but that doesn't stop me from loving him" I said, "We still love each and here I am dreaming of doing some other guy"  
  
"And that other guy happens to be Alec" OC said with a side ways glance  
  
"Yer, Alec"  
  
"Boo, it's alright to find other men hot, you're not a saint"  
  
"But" she didn't let me finish  
  
"But nothing Boo, you human like us all and you have needs and feelings"  
  
"But, why Alec" I moaned again  
  
"Cos, he's hot" OC laughs  
  
"Your not helping" I moaned  
  
"Look, I say don't worry about it"  
  
"But Boo, lay off the boy, it ain't his fault" OC smiled but her tone was serious  
  
"Ok" I half smiled at her…  
  
"Oh and one more thing Boo"  
  
"What"  
  
"Give up this guilt thing, or at least try to" OC looking at me "you never gonna have any sort of life until ya do"  
  
We both sat there in silence, for what seemed like hours…  
  
TBC – reviews please, should I even bother going on??? 


	3. Anger

Guilt and Pain  
  
Chapter 4  
  
  
  
I woke the next morning after my chat with OC, and after another dream about Alec. I had promised myself that when I saw Alec I was going to be cool, not be a bitch!  
  
"Not his fault Max, I just have to keep remembering that" I said to herself  
  
"It has to be his fault, I just haven't thought of a reason yet" I smiled a little  
  
"I can do this" I said to myself as I walked into Jam Pony  
  
"Oh, it was nice of you to turn up missy" Normal said in his usual sarcastic tone, as he through a package at me. Then tapping the face of this watch.  
  
"That needed to be there, yesterday, now bip bip" With the usual wave of his hand  
  
"Yer, and good morning to you too" Being sarcastic back. One day, I swear that hand is coming off!  
  
"No time for good mornings" Normal then turned his attention on to someone else..  
  
"You, I have no signature for this…"  
  
I didn't even wait to hear the rest; I headed over to my locker and straight into Alec.  
  
"Hey, watch where you're going" Then I realised that it was Alec.  
  
"You walked into me Max" Alec said holding is hands up.  
  
"Yer, sorry" I said, starting to open my locker  
  
"What, that's it" he laughed  
  
"No, if you do that again I'll bust your arse etc..etc..etc"  
  
"Not today" I said without looking at him"  
  
He leaned against the locker next to mine as I was getting out my bike gear  
  
"So is it safe to presume that you are in a good mood today"  
  
"Yes I am" Now facing him, I can do this, I kept telling myself again.  
  
"Why, you get some last night" Alec laughed again  
  
Well, Alec may as well have put up a red rag to a bull, because that is all I saw, RED…  
  
"Fuck you Alec" As I had a flash back to my dream last night, and a VERY NAKED Alec and I was starting to sweat now..  
  
"So I can only be happy, if I got nailed last night" I spate at him  
  
"Sex & money might be the only things that make you happy, but for me it's a normal life, and my friends" God I had to get away from him now!! I felt a heat rising, I wasn't sure if it was the flash back or my anger.  
  
"Maxi, I was joking" Alec looked taken back.  
  
As I went to walk off, Alec grabbed my arm  
  
"Max, seriously I was joking," He said, "I never meant" I didn't let him finish  
  
"Just leave it" and I pulled away, picked up the package and I was out of there.  
  
  
  
Alec just watched Max leave, Sketchy walked up to him.  
  
"What you do now Bro?"  
  
"I haven't got a clue, but something's up with her" Alec was still looking at the doorway of Jam Pony, which was now empty.  
  
"Maybe OC knows what's going on" Sketchy moved his head in the direction of OC  
  
"Cindy over here" Sketchy called to her  
  
"Wass up" OC started to walk over to them  
  
" I was hoping you could tell me" Alec said to Cindy  
  
OC had a feeling she knew what was coming and She didn't want to lie to Alec, she'd grown to like him over the past few months.  
  
"What ya mean" OC trying to be coy  
  
" I mean with Max" he was looking straight at her " Is she in trouble? I could help if she is" Alec sounded concerned  
  
"Yer, cos she is being a number 1 bitch to my bro here"  
  
"Oi, watch your mouth" OC & Alec said at the same time.  
  
"No Boo, she ain't in trouble" She felt bad for him, he didn't deserve Max's back lashes and OC also knew that Alec thought a lot of Max, but how far that went she wasn't sure. OC also knew that Alec could drive a saint to scream, but he always had Max's back.  
  
" So, what the fuck is going on" Alec said  
  
"Look, she has some stuff going on and you happen to" OC looked away not wanting to say too much.  
  
"I happen to what"  
  
"Look, things getting her down with Logan and stuff" It was the only thing OC could come up with, and it was partly true!  
  
"God, the same old thing again, that girl really needs to move on" Alec was a little more than sarcastic  
  
"What she really needs is a good" Sketchy tried to finish his sentence with no luck  
  
"Don't even finish that line" Alec said, while OC slapped him around his head  
  
"Little advise, Boo" OC to Alec  
  
"Yer"  
  
"Try to stay out of her way for a while" She smiled and patted him on the shoulder  
  
"Cool" Alec knew that something was up; the troubles with Logan could have something to do with it. But there was more and Alec knew he had something to do with it. Ben was the only thing he could think of but, they had worked that out and been completely cool for ages, then she just changed, more or less overnight.  
  
"Sketchy, get your lazy butt over here, bip bip" Normal bellowed  
  
"Coming, see you guy's later, yer" Waved as he walked over to the ever- moaning Normal  
  
"Later" Alec replied & OC nodded  
  
When Sketchy had gone, Alec turned to OC  
  
"Cindy"  
  
"What, Boo"  
  
"Is it me" Cos Max has saved my ass loads of times and if I've done" Alec shut up  
  
"Boo, it ain't your fault" OC felt for him  
  
"Hey, no big deal, It's not like I'm not used it" Alec laughed, his usual everything is fine with me laugh.  
  
"Yer, I know Boo" With half a laugh, but she could just tell this was getting to Alec more than he was letting on. She had half a thought to letting him know the truth, but she couldn't and wouldn't do that to Max…  
  
"I'll see ya later Boo"  
  
"Yer, later Cindy"  
  
As OC walked off, she looked back and Alec was sitting on the bench in what looked to be deep thought.  
  
It was…. getting to Alec more than he was letting anyone know, it was pissing him off. The few months after that night at the police station, he and Max had become friends or so he thought. He watched her back and she did the same for him, but the change to him was more than a shock, it hurt him. He didn't have many friends, Sketchy, OC & even Normal in a funny way, but Max was different, she was the only one that could understand him and he the same to her. It had really shocked him the night she told him about Ben and how she had killed him. He felt for her, he could see the pain and the guilt she had carried for so long. Alec could understand that his face could of only brought back unwelcome memoirs for her. But they got over that and moved on, they became friends and if he had to admit it, he missed her friendship, he just missed her. And he didn't know how to feel about that… 


	4. A team, like it or not!

Changes – Chapter 5  
  
A Team, like it or not  
  
I still hadn't calmed down after the scene with Alec this morning. Then the last thing I needed or wanted, happen. Logan called, or should I say EO. He had a mission for me or should I say us! I tried to tell him that I could do this alone  
  
"Max, this is a 2 man job" he paused "and you know this"  
  
"I can be in and out quicker by myself" Liar, liar, lair I kept thinking  
  
"Max are you trying to get yourself captured, or worse killed" Logan sounded concerned  
  
"No, but…. Alec has pissed me off and I'm not in the mood for him" I snapped  
  
"Hey, I know what Alec's like, but this is a 2 man job" He said "We don't have our hands on another X-5" He smiled  
  
"Yeah, but you ring him"  
  
"I'll tell him to meet you on the corner of Lamington & Prince 23:00 hours" He smiled  
  
"Cool, and yes I'll be careful" I smiled  
  
Logan smiled once more and drove off. He then called Alex.  
  
"Yeah" Alec answered his phone  
  
"Alec, its Logan"  
  
"What can I do for the all knowing and powerful OZ" Alec liked that one  
  
"Right….EO needs your help" Logan shot back  
  
There had always been something about Alec that got to Logan, even on top of the whole virus thing. His cocky attitude, his ability to get a dig in every time they spoke.  
  
"Yeah, what's the deal" Alec sniffed  
  
"It's a high security government building, which is holding discs that EO wants to get his hands on, they have incriminating evidence against 5 high powered seniors" He went on  
  
"They prove that together they set-up a funds systems to skim off money from their states funds, money that should belong to people who need it"  
  
"Yeah yeah yeah, I get there're the bad guy's" Alec sounding bored  
  
"Meet Max at" Logan was cut off before he could finish  
  
"I'll do it alone"  
  
"What is up with you 2" Logan snapped  
  
"What are you talking about" Alec sounded surprised  
  
"Max said the same thing" Logan now sounding suspicious  
  
"She's being a bitch lately, I don't know what's up with her, women's troubles I suppose" Alec sneered  
  
"Whatever, but this is a 2 man job, it's heavily guarded"  
  
"Where we meeting" Alec quickly said.  
  
He didn't want Max going in alone on this one.  
  
"Lamington & Prince 23:00 hours, good luck"  
  
"Thanks" Alec said.  
  
~ ~ ~  
  
23:05 Alec was late.  
  
"Fucking typical, if he's not here in 5, I am out of here" Max looking at her watch again.  
  
Next thing she knew he was behind her.  
  
"Looking for me" Alec with a smug smile on this face  
  
"Your late" I shot back  
  
"Nice to see you too Max" Alec replied "Clamed down after this mornings show"  
  
"Look this is work so cut the buddy chat," I warned  
  
"Whatever ya say Maxi" Alec was full of sarcasm  
  
Max started heading for her bike, then only to realise that Alec was behind her.  
  
"Where's you transport?" I said, as I realise he didn't have any  
  
"Right behind you" Looking at my bike  
  
"Unless you want me to bus it," Alec said dryly  
  
"I thought you'd have some…thing" Last thing I wanted was him holding on to me, not now, not with the dreams business. I got on the bike, Alec jumped on behind me. I tried to sit as far to the front, without making it look Suspicious  
  
I took off at a speed, which then only made him hold on tight. This is fine Max, not a problem. But feeling him so close to me was making me really uncomfortable, his smell, and his arms holding me tight!  
  
"Fucking pull yourself together MAX" Trying to snap out of it  
  
"Why is this so hard for me, its Alec for Fuck Sake" I moaned to myself  
  
"Because the last time you were this close to his crutch, your foot was touching it, not your ass" Smiling now  
  
Then Alec said, "Max how far now"  
  
"Five minutes, I'm going to pull over soon, so we can walk the rest," Talk about work, this is good. Yeah keep talking work, feeling better now!  
  
  
  
Once we were parked, we carried on by foot until we saw the target. A large red brick building with darken windows; around it was a fence, looked 13 to 15 feet high. Alec marked two the guards, and signalled to me to meet him around back. I nodded and headed to the rear side of the building waiting for the signalled to move in.  
  
I could now see Alec, he signalled for me to move in, I was up and over the fence and blazed around towards Alec. As I turned the corner a guard pulled a gun and shouting Holt. I zigged zagged until I was around him; I kicked him down with a good kick to the kidneys, following in with a punch to the face just to make sure. Carried on up, to where Alec was waiting at a now open door, with two unconscious guards. We were straight in, heading for the Chief of Operations office. Three guards appeared; we took them out quickly, only to be met with 3 more. They put up a little more fight, but were dispatched the same way.  
  
The office was on the 1st floor, Alec headed up first as I was watching his back, then there was gunfire, there was a guard shooting at us from down the hall. Alec went down, I didn't have time to check on him, had to take out this guard. His gun jammed for split second but it was enough for me to make my move, I ran and jump kicked him in the head and he wasn't getting up.  
  
"Nice move Maxi" Alec impressed "And I of all people knows how one of your kicks feel" He laughed  
  
"I thought you were hit," I said  
  
"Nothing, lets get this stuff and get out of here," Alec said while assessing the area  
  
"It's getting too busy for my liking"  
  
"Yeah, I was thinking that myself" I said as I move to the backstairs  
  
We were up and on the first floor, in seconds. Only to be met by 2 more guards, one of them court me straight in the face, I was so pissed I knocked him out with one punch. Alec wasn't far behind me with his guard. This was getting a bit mad now, to many fucking guards. They knew we were here, but hopefully not why, so that would give us little time.  
  
"The office is down the hall 4 doors on the left," I said  
  
"You go and I'll stay here on look out, they may have friends" He winked  
  
I blazed and was out outside the office door, I rammed my shoulder into it, opening it easy and quieter than a kick. I was remembering the info Logan gave me, 3rd cabinet on the left, under the file named J R Hartley; I swear I've heard that name before. I pulled the draw open and found the file, and I grabbed the discs. As I started out the door, Alec was running towards me with 3 guards shooting at him and now me.  
  
"Through the window" He shouted  
  
I knew what he meant and I run as fast as I could, towards the end of the corridor and Jump through the glass window at the end and Alec was right behind me. We landed in a roll on the cement floor that was going to fucking hurt later. They were firing on us now, and I felt one bullet fly pass my head, I was up and off. Alec was behind me, there were guards coming from the left and right now.  
  
"What the fuck is happening Max?" Alec shouted  
  
"Shut up and move," I ordered  
  
We saw the fence coming up, just as we heard a blast of more gunshots. We took our chance and jumped, my heel just clipped the top of the fence and that was enough to tip me off balance. I end up landing on Alec, lying right on top of him. Our eyes just locked for split second, I felt a spark, not now!!!!  
  
"Love to Max, but now isn't the time" Alec teasing  
  
"In ya dreams pal" I shot back  
  
With that we were up and running to where the bike was parked up, we could still hear the gunshots coming our way. I got to the bike first, and started her up. Once I felt Alec jump on the back, we were off and we headed straight to Joshua's  
  
  
  
I know the mission is really lame and has no action. But it will all lead to something I promise… Reviews please.. Thanks to everyone that has given me such great & positive feedback. : ~ ) 


	5. 18 yr-old Whiskey

Changes - Chapter 6  
  
18 yr-old Whiskey  
  
  
  
On the drive over to Joshua's I had decided not to go in, I'd drop by and see Josh tomorrow. Anyway, I felt too nervous to be around Alec at the moment, one because I couldn't help being a bitch around him, and two, I liked the feel of him, a little too much!! I wanted to head over to Logan's to give him the discs, and after tonight's mission and the whole realising that Alec is a hotty; I needed to be where I felt safe.  
  
"Tell Joshua I'll drop by tomorrow" Max said, driving off…  
  
"No thanks needed, honest" Alec shouted after Max, "none what so ever" He said to himself  
  
As soon as Max was out of sight, Alec unzipped his jacket and touched his side. As he did, he flinched. He had been hit, he didn't think it was serious; he'd check on it when got inside. Walking up the stairs, Alec remembered the bottle of 18-year-old double malt whiskey, which would help.  
  
Alec walked in to the front room, throwing his jacket on the sofa and headed to the cabinet. Pulling out a glass and the whiskey, he poured himself a large one and downed it, it felt good going down and he could feel the heat from the drink travelling to the rest of his body. He was cold, so he headed to the fire and started to stoke it up as he added more wood. Alec crouched, just staring into the flames as they started to grow. He thought about what had happen that night, the mission. It had been more than heavily guarded, more like a mini army, which the all-powerful Oz had neglected to inform them. But as long as he got he's precious evidence, that's all that mattered, but then again he had his own transgenic soldiers, what did he care. Sitting up in his penthouse playing the super hero, it pissed Alec off. But Max seemed to think he was god himself. It got to Alec the way Logan run rings around her, Logan would only have to say jump, Max would say how high…  
  
"Alec" Joshua was standing in the door way  
  
"Hey, Josh" Alec said as he started to stand up. As he did a sharp pain went through his side. Alec lent against the wall as Joshua rushed to help him.  
  
"You're bleeding" Joshua said with concern in his voice.  
  
" It's nothing, think it's a scratch"  
  
"Sit over here" as Joshua led Alec to the sofa. "What happened"?  
  
"Shot" Alec replied.  
  
Joshua gave him a confused look  
  
"Mission for the great Oz" Alec sneered  
  
Joshua now tilting his head to one side, looking even more confused  
  
"Eyes Only" Alec replied  
  
"Logan" Joshua corrected him. Josh knew that Alec didn't like Logan and he felt it had something to do with Max.  
  
"I'll get stuff to clean it" As Joshua, headed out of the room  
  
"Thanks buddy" Alec shouted after him as he got up and poured himself another drink.  
  
As Alec sat back down he placed his drink on the table and started to pull off his jumper.  
  
"Fucking hell" he said, as another sharp pain shot through him.  
  
"Hey, let me help" Joshua pulling the jump off. "Let me see"  
  
Alec moved around so Joshua could look at the wound.  
  
"It looks like it went straight through" Joshua still looking concerned  
  
"Hey, remember man, they made us with super healing powers" Alec's voice full of sarcasm. "Good old Manticore" As he lifted his drink to them  
  
"This is going to hurt" Just as Joshua, poured antiseptic straight on the wound  
  
"Fucking hell Joshua, between you & Max" Alec stopped & Joshua didn't look up  
  
"You and little feller fighting" Joshua asked, while still continuing to clean & patch up the wound  
  
"Not me, her" Alec Continued "I don't know what the fuck is up with her, all I know is I can't breath around her, without her biting my head off"  
  
"Why don't you ask her" Joshua replied innocently  
  
"Cos, I….I don't give a shit" Alec snapped  
  
Joshua looked up at Alec, knowing that he did give a shit.  
  
"There, all patched up" Joshua sitting back, looking pleased with the job he had done.  
  
"Hey, nice work Josh, thanks man" Alec smiling at him  
  
"Sorry man, for…you know snapping at ya, just tried and in a bit of pain"  
  
"In pain over the wound or Max" Joshua said without looking at Alec  
  
"Max, why would I be in pain over her" Alec sounded take back by Joshua's comment  
  
"Cos you care about her" Joshua continued not giving Alec a chance to interrupt  
  
"You are friends"  
  
"Yeah, some friend" Alec said while staring into his drink  
  
"She is your friend, and she cares about you" Joshua's voice was gentle  
  
"She used to be, and I don't know about the caring part" he sniffed "but she has always had my back, even when I didn't deserve it, but"  
  
"But" Joshua trying to get Alec to talk  
  
"But…..I think I've done something" Alec started to say but stopped  
  
"Have you done something" Joshua asked  
  
"That's it, I haven't, and well I don't think I have"  
  
"You won't know till to ask" Joshua said  
  
Alec stayed silent; Joshua knew that was about as much talking as Alec was going to do tonight.  
  
"You need to rest now" Joshua gently  
  
"Yeah, I'll go up in a minute" Alec nodded  
  
"Night Alec" Joshua said as he got up.  
  
"Do you want me to speak to Max" Joshua asked  
  
"Nay man, it ain't that big of a deal" Alec half laughing  
  
"See ya" Joshua said as he walked out of the room.  
  
Alec got up and poured himself another drink and moved the sofa nearer the fire. He sat back down after throwing on a few more bits of wood. He stared at the fire again, and thought about the conversation he had with Joshua.  
  
"It ain't that big of a deal"  
  
"Yeah, whatever you say Alec, Whatever you say!" As he took another mouthful from his drink 


	6. In your dreams pal

Changes - Chapter 7  
  
In your dreams pal  
  
  
  
I had gone straight to Logan's after dropping off Alec, Logan was waiting up for me, funny how he knew I would drop by afterwards. I started to tell him about the mission and how things didn't go according to plan.  
  
"Yeah, it got really crazy at one point" I said  
  
Logan never answered  
  
"Logan" I called as I turn around from staring out of the window.  
  
Logan was too busy down loading the files on to this computer to listen.  
  
"Logan" I snapped this time  
  
"Yeah" Logan said not looking back from the computer  
  
"Fucking hell I'm trying to talk to you about tonight, but all you're interested in, is the booty," I said as I grabbed my jacket and headed for the door  
  
"Max" Logan called after me  
  
"What" I snapped  
  
"Look I'm sorry, but this is really important Max" Logan continued "EO & the S1W have been trying to get evidence on these guys for months"  
  
"Look, I can see your busy I'm going" I replied dryly as I walked out and slammed the door behind me.  
  
But either way he made me feel bad for not understanding. Still pissed at Logan, I decided to take a long drive before hitting the sack.  
  
~ ~ ~  
  
I was staring into his eyes; it felt like he was looking in to my soul, his touch burning my naked skin, as he moved his hand slowly up the arch of my back. He then used his fingers to trace along my arms; he smiled as a shiver went through the whole of my body. He pushed my hair away from face, his touch made me in inhaled deeply. His hand moved through my hair until it was behind my head; he pulled me slowly towards him, until our lips touched. I allowed his tongue to gently explore my mouth until it found mine. Our kiss started out gently, only to turn into hungry, we devoured each other as if we were going to be torn part by some unseen entity. He suddenly pulled away and stared at me, both he spoke.  
  
  
  
"Max I want you" His voice deep  
  
I smiled as I leaned down and whispered into his ear  
  
"In your dreams pal"  
  
"No, in your dreams Maxi" Alec smiled  
  
I shot up sweating and breathing heavily and looked to the empty side of my bed as if I would see Alec lying there. I was still breathing deeply as I started to lie back down, slowly curling up in to a ball…  
  
  
  
TBC  
  
I'm not sure about his one. I know it's short, but it does lend somewhere!  
  
Please, please keep reviewing, it really helps me. 


	7. Gifted I Guess?

Changes – Ch 8  
  
Gifted I Guess  
  
I didn't go back to sleep after the dream, it had unnerved me more than any other. It was hard to explain, but it felt like he knew my secret. So of course I was not in the best of moods going to work the next day. I told myself that I had to stay out of Alec's way and count to 10 if he said anything that might set me off.  
  
"Oh please Max, the boy can't even cough without you dogging him"  
  
" I am pathetic" I wined to myself  
  
I rode into Jam Pony; OC had not come home last night so I was eager to see how she was. I spotted her talking to Sketchy, I as about to walk over to her when Normal got me!  
  
"Over here, missy miss" Normal called  
  
"No time for chit chat, were a man down today" Normal saying while still looking at the job list  
  
"Who's the lucky slacker" I drooled sarcasm  
  
"Our boy Alec" Normal sighed  
  
"Oh great because he couldn't get out to bed, we have to do extra runs," I snapped  
  
"Bored with talking, bip bip" Shoving a pile of parcels in to my arms  
  
OC walked over to me. "Hey Boo" Smiling  
  
"Hey" I replied  
  
"So what's up with your Boy" OC asked. I had given up trying to correct now.  
  
"Who knows, to lazy to get out of bed" I sneered  
  
"Hey, I wonder whose bed though" OC laughing  
  
"God when is he ever going to grow up" I said through gritted teeth, not really liking the idea of him in someone else's bed  
  
"Whoa Boo, the boy might be ill, I was only joking"  
  
"I was with him last night, and there was nothing wrong with when I dropped him back at Joshua's" I said with no sympathy  
  
"People, people bip bip, times a wasting" Normal yelled  
  
"Look I'll see ya later" OC said as she started to walk her bike off, then stopped and looked back at me  
  
"Boo, why don't ya pop by and see if the Boy is ok"  
  
"I'll see how the day pans out," I said with half a smile  
  
OC nodded but she knew Max wasn't going to pass by, not with the way she was feeling about Alec at the moment. OC also knew that at the rate things were going, something was going to blow. Even though Max was her friend; she was bringing what ever was coming on herself.  
  
~ ~ ~  
  
Alec still hurt the next morning; enough to know that riding around on a bike was not an option. By tomorrow he would be able to carry himself without anyone knowing, the last thing he wanted was undue attention, especially with all the mutant stories in the papers lately. Why didn't he tell Max, because she wouldn't give a shit anyway, that's why? He had even made Joshua promise not to tell her  
  
"Why, Max is your friend" Joshua innocently "she can help"  
  
"The only thing she'd help with, is to add to my pain with a headache" Alec dryly  
  
"Alec, listen to Joshua" he paused "Speak to Max, find out what is wrong"  
  
"Look Josh" Joshua wouldn't let Alec finish  
  
"No, you listen, we all have to stick together, people afraid of what they don't understand" Joshua looking sad "They will know about us one day and we will all need each other"  
  
"Ok man, ok" Alec in calming tone  
  
"You will speak to Max, promise me" Joshua asked  
  
"I promise" Alec replied reluctantly  
  
~ ~ ~  
  
Alec arrived at Jam Pony the next morning, still feeling sore; he'd be fine as long as he didn't get into any heavy trouble today. Normal stopped him and called him over  
  
"Hello, nice to see you made it in today" Normal sounding happy to see him  
  
"Yeah, sorry about yesterday, I had some bug, real mess you know" Alec continued "I was throwing up all over the place then"  
  
"Stop, stop, I have a mental picture"  
  
"Oh, but I haven't told you about when I" Alec sounding genuine  
  
"Thanks for not sharing any more information, now bip bip" He waved Alec off  
  
Alec knew too much information should do the trick with the ever- inquisitive Normal, and it did. He walked over to Sketchy who was getting ready at his locker.  
  
"Hey man"  
  
"Hey dude" Said Sketchy as he & Alec did there usual hand greeting.  
  
Sketchy decided to follow in with a playful punch to the stomach; Alec flinched and grabbed his side, and groan.  
  
"Hey man I'm sorry, wuss up" Looking suspicious  
  
"Look man, don't say anything alright" Alec paused and looked around to make sure no one was listening, this got Sketchy attention  
  
"I wasn't sick yesterday" Alec winked at him  
  
"Ya mean" Sketchy's mind now working over time  
  
"Yeah man, pulled some very very energetic honey the other night and we spend the whole day yesterday getting to know each" Alec grinning  
  
"Nay, what is it with you man" Sketchy drooling with envy  
  
"Well Sketch, what can I say except I have a gift" Alec now laughing  
  
Then from behind them  
  
"So that's the fucking reason why I had to do extra runs yesterday" Max seething  
  
Alec & sketchy spun around to see Max standing there.  
  
"Fuck" Alec said under his breather  
  
"Hey Max" Sketchy said  
  
"Look Normal, wants me" Sketchy lying as he headed past Max "See you later guys"  
  
"Look Max" Alec sighed knowing what was coming  
  
"Don't fucking look me" Max was fuming and Alec knew there was no way to calm her down  
  
"When are you going to Fucking grow up" Max spat at Alec  
  
"Max, back off alright" Alec now snapped back  
  
Max was about to launch into verbal attack, when Normal yelled  
  
"Hello, the two love birds over there, any chance of getting some work done today"  
  
"As you two seem to be enjoying each other company so much" Normal beckoned them over  
  
"You two can handle the whole of section 7, now bip bip" Normal now with a smile on his face  
  
"What"  
  
"What nothing Missy Miss, there are the packages" Normal pointing to the pile & waving his hand, in his go away motion.  
  
Max made a move to say something when Alec jumped in  
  
"On it Normal" As he moved in front of her  
  
Max stomped over and started to pick up some of the packages, while giving Alec the look of death. Once the parcels were all collected they headed for their bikes.  
  
"Max" Alec tried to say something  
  
But the look she gave him as enough to stop him. Max headed for the exit and Alec followed, as he went to get on the bike he took a deep sigh. He wasn't in the mood for this, and he knew that this was going to be a shit day.  
  
Can you fucking believe that bastard? I had to do extra runs because he is fucking some skanky ho. I knew he wasn't sick, I knew. I'm sicker than him, I'm the stupid bitch dreaming of fucking the walking hard on, ewwww.  
  
What is wrong with me? "Your jealous, that's what's wrong with you? I sighed  
  
I wasn't in the mood for this today. It was going to be a shit day… 


	8. Home Truths

Changes – Ch 9  
  
Home Truths  
  
They cycled in silence for what seemed like ages, Alec was actually starting to think that things were not going to be that bad after all; he could quite happily be ignored for the rest of the day. Just then Alec had to turn sharply to miss a van that pulled out in front of him, in the process knocking into Max, making her stop abruptly.  
  
"What is your fucking problem," Max fired at Alec  
  
"You could see that wasn't my fault," Alec shot back  
  
" Course, cos nothing is ever your fault" Max didn't stop for breath "Everything that happens to you is some else's fault," Max shouting now  
  
People were now stopping to take in the show, Alec looking around at the small crowd that was starting to stare.  
  
"Do you have to shout, everyone and his wife are watching us,"  
  
"I don't give a fuck who is watching, it's about time that you get some home truths"  
  
The crowd now getting bigger, people were whispering  
  
"Glad that ain't my girlfriend" a man comment to a friend as they laughed  
  
"What you fucking saying pal" Max started to make a move towards the guy. Alec grabbed her arm  
  
"Max this is not the time, just leave it"  
  
"Don't fucking touch me" As she pulled her arm from his hold  
  
"You of all people do not have the right to touch me, you are a self centred lying prick" Max screaming at Alec  
  
Alec was just staring at her, where the fuck was this coming from  
  
"You think of yourself and no one else," Max continued with no intention of stopping  
  
"You care for no one other than yourself, you'd sell your own if you thought you'd make a buck, oh and have in the past."  
  
Alec felt a rage starting to grow in him, but he kept looking around at the growing crowd and knew that they had to move on before sector police were called.  
  
"Max, we need go," Alec said through gritted teeth  
  
"Yes, lets go and finish the whole of S E C T O R 7 shall W E," Max not letting up  
  
"This on top of all the extra runs I had to do yesterday, because you were to busy fucking some scanky Ho," Max still not letting up "You never think how your actions affect everyone else,"  
  
"THAT'S fucking enough," Alec, shouted straight into Max's face as he grabbed her arm and started to move her off the road, Max tried to pull away but she couldn't.  
  
She looked up at Alec  
  
"Let fucking go," Max still trying to pull her arm away  
  
"Shows over people, nothing more to see," Alec shouting over his shoulder, as he pushed Max into the abandoned warehouse that they were standing beside.  
  
"What do you think you are." Max never got to finish  
  
"Just shut the fuck up Max," Alec screamed at her while he pulled in their bikes and slammed the door shut  
  
"Now, no where to ride to hey Maxi, so lets find out what is up with the queen of bitch" Alec spat at her  
  
Max now looking concerned, she didn't like the idea that she wasn't in control of the situation anymore.  
  
"Come on Maxi, enlighten me," Alec continued "what have I done that you hate me so much, that you just can't help being a completed EVIL BITCH around me,"  
  
"Just being you," Max snapped back, unable to tell him the real reason, and starting to get nervous.  
  
"Let me think, is all the times I've had your back" Alec continued "Or is it all the times I've drop whatever I was doing to go on some fucking mission for EO"  
  
"Or the times I have defended you to people when they have thought you were in the S1W, or even one of them transgenic freaks" I voice still full of anger  
  
"Or was it cos I couldn't come to work yesterday because" Alec was cut off  
  
"You were fucking a Scanky Ho," Max cut in, full of sarcasm  
  
"OR WAS IT, because I had been shot on the mission and needed a day to heal," As Alec was saying this he lifted up his jumper to show the wound  
  
"Hey that don't matter, cos its only Alec" Alec paused  
  
"I don't have feelings do I, I'm the ever smart arse so who cares yeah,"  
  
Max could not believe how angry Alec was.  
  
"I still trying to get use to this life, fuck I've only been out in the world 8 months"  
  
"If anyone should understand, it should be you" Alec could believe the all this hurt was coming out of him and he had no control over it  
  
"No, you don't give me a break, you just love to put me down on every turn,"  
  
"I thought we were…..friends, after that time we talked, we'd got close Max" His voice now softer but sounding miserable  
  
"I know I don't think at times, and I do and say things that I shouldn't, but," Alec stopped.  
  
"But I've never had friends before, if I've done something, said something, then tell me."  
  
"I can't put up with the way things are, this fighting every time we meet, it's getting to me, and I …….care Max, I……care about you," Alec struggling to say the thing he had been feeling for so long  
  
Max was in complete shock; Alec was right he was there for her or Logan whenever they called. He watched her back and she his and she was hurting because of her guilt for how she felt about him,  
  
"Is it cos a look like Ben" Alec's voice now quieter  
  
"No," Max unable to look at Alec  
  
"Then what," His voice raising again  
  
"Nothing lets just leave it," As she tried to push pass him  
  
Alec grabbed her and pushed her against the wall  
  
"Your not fucking leaving until you tell me"  
  
"Don't do this Alec please" Max was begging him, she did not want to say it. She couldn't fight him, not when he was hurt, Alec was looking her straight in the eyes, oh god these eyes, those beautifully eyes and all I was doing was hurting him.  
  
"Tell me," Alec pushed her against the wall again  
  
"NO," Max screamed  
  
"FUCKING TELL ME WHAT I'VE DONE?"  
  
"IT'S NOT YOU, IT'S ME," Max scream back  
  
Alec let Max go and looked at her confused "What do you mean you?"  
  
"Can't you leave it at that," Max begged again  
  
"No I can't," Alec said  
  
Max stayed silent, which only made Alec grab her again and push her against the wall  
  
"Tell me Max, NOW,"  
  
"Cos, I feel guilty," She screamed at him  
  
"So, it is about Ben then" Alec said  
  
"It's not about Ben" Max's heart was beating so fast; she didn't want to do this.  
  
"It's my guilt over Logan" She whimpered, "Because I love Logan"  
  
"Bollocks Max, what has Logan got to do with me" Alec struggling to understand what she was talking about  
  
"Don't you understand," Max said while looking at him "I've had…..feelings for you, dreams even," She couldn't bring herself to say anymore, feeling to a shamed  
  
Alec took a few steps back, in shock as realised what she was saying.  
  
"So, let me get this right, you've made me feel shit for the last couple of months because you've felt guilty,"  
  
Max just nodded without looking at him  
  
"What the fuck are we in, 6 grade," Alec had by no means finished "because you are full of guilt, which I have no control over, you have bitched, humiliated me and made me think I am not worth the air that this plant has to offer, yeah"  
  
"Yeah," Max in whispered  
  
"All cos you have feelings for me, fuck Max I'd hate to see what you do to people you don't care for" he sneered  
  
Max couldn't look at him; she knew that she deserved whatever was coming.  
  
"You had me questioning myself, on what I could have done to make you hate me so much"  
  
"You had me thinking and feeling like I was a worthless piece of shit, hey Phy-ops couldn't have done a better job" Alec that would hurt, and it did as he saw her cringe  
  
"Do you know I even thought about just up and leaving," Alec said, Max now looked up at him  
  
"Yeah, cos I thought this ain't worth it, all the fighting and if you are hurting someone you care about. Someone you rate highly, then it's the right thing to do?"  
  
"But when I looked around at what I had, my friends, my job, a life Max, A life," Alec paused "I couldn't go, this was something I never had before and I liked it and I didn't want to leave it"  
  
"So I put up with your bitching," he sneered  
  
Max tried to speak "Alec I'm"  
  
"Don't fucking say it Max" Alec shot at her  
  
"But I"  
  
"But nothing, I'll tell what's going to happen from here," Alec in a calm voice, which frighten Max more than any of his ranting earlier  
  
"We're finished, do you understand, we may work at Jam Pony," continuing in the voice that had no emotion. "But I do not want you to speak to me, to look at, to even acknowledge me, there'll be none of the mission shit either for EO, tell him to get himself another toy soldier to play with"  
  
"We are no longer friends, do you understand" Alec looking max straight in the eyes  
  
"Yes" Max whispered  
  
With that Alec turn around and picked up his bike and open the door and left. As Max watched him walk out the door, she slowly slid down the wall until she was hugging her knees. She couldn't believe what had just happened, the pain and angry that Alec had thrown at her, was well deserved. She finally realised what she had done, she had hurt a friend, and a true friend and now it was too late, now he hated her….  
  
TBC  
  
Reviews please, I think I handled the fight ok, but I think I have used phases that Alec and Max wouldn't.  
  
Thanks for all the positive feedback it really helps 


	9. After shock

Changes – Ch 9  
  
After shock  
  
Max sat there on the cold damp floor of the warehouse, for what seemed like hours. She finally pulled herself up off the floor and headed for her bike. Max knew what she had been doing to Alec for the last coupled months, what she didn't know was how much she had been hurting him.  
  
  
  
After she had admitted the reason for her behaviour towards him. Max was stunned by the rage and anger that Alec had unleashed on her. The emotion he had shown was nothing like she had seen before, even when Rachel died.  
  
Max picked up her bike and headed out the door, she delivered her packages in a dream state, all she could think about was Alec. By the time she got back to Jam Pony only Normal was left.  
  
"What time do you call this missy"?  
  
"Sorry, I…I, sorry." Max didn't have the mental energy to fight; she just wanted to go home.  
  
"Well….Um don't let it happen again" Normal said, taken back that Max wasn't giving her usually smart ass comments.  
  
"Night" Max said, still in deep thought as she walked out  
  
"Good night" Normal replied, still not sure what to make of Max's behaviour.  
  
By the time Max got home, she just wanted to crawl into a hot bath and then into bed, She kept replaying the days events in her mind, as she started heating water for her bath.  
  
"Cos, I feel guilty," She screamed at him  
  
"So, it is about Ben then," Alec said  
  
"It's not about Ben" Max's heart was beating so fast; she didn't want to do this.  
  
"It's my guilt over Logan" She whimpered, "Because I love Logan"  
  
"Max, what has Logan got to do with me" Alec struggling to understand what she was talking about  
  
"Don't you understand," Max said while looking at him "I've had…..feelings for you, dreams even," She couldn't bring herself to say anymore, feeling to a shamed  
  
1 Once her bath was filled, Max lay in it until it went cold, just staring and crying on the inside. When she finally dragged herself out of the bath, she dressed and crawled into her bed, were she lay awake for hours before falling into a disturbed sleep.  
  
2  
  
3 ~ ~ ~  
  
Alec had walked out of the warehouse in a state of shock and confusion. His anger had no bounds, as did his feeling of betrayal, by the one person that he should be able to trust. He had been so stupid; he had let down his barriers and in doing so let himself get hurt, that wasn't going to happen again. He had put up with Max's bitching and put downs because he thought that he had done something to hurt her, or the way he reminded her of Ben.  
  
Max had admitted that she had been having feelings towards him, dreams even. But to Max, the thought of her having any sort feelings towards Alec, disgusted her so much, that when she had any contact with him she spat out every bit of venom that she had inside her. If Alec had to admit it, that's what hurt the most, that Max hated the thought of wanting him so much that she could react in that way.  
  
He finished his runs had headed back to Jam Pony, he wanted to hand in his signatures and get the hell out there. Alec walked up to the counter, Normal was shouting at someone for some reasons only know to Normal.  
  
"Hello, where's Missy Miss" Normal said as he checked the signature sheet  
  
"Finishing her runs" Alec replied  
  
"Well," Normal never got to finished, as Alec walked off  
  
As he open his locker, OC came up behind him  
  
"Hey Boo, where's Max"  
  
"On runs" Alec snapped  
  
"You two not fighting again" OC signed  
  
Alec shammed his lock door shut and walked off without even answering. Cindy knew that something had happen; she followed Alec until he was outside.  
  
"Alec." She called after him  
  
Alec stopped without looking around "Leave it Cindy"  
  
"Leave what, what happen Alec" OC now sounding concern  
  
"You knew, didn't you" Alec said, still not turning around  
  
"Knew what" Cindy knowing what was coming  
  
Alec slowly turned around "Why Max was treating me like shit" Alec with anger in his voice  
  
"Alec…I couldn't say anything" OC paused "Max is my friend"  
  
"Am I your friend Cindy"? Alec genuinely asking  
  
"Yes Alec, your a friend" Cindy knowing that he needed to hear that right now  
  
"Max is my best friend, you must understand that" OC trying to say it in a way as not to hurt him  
  
"I thought Max was my friend" Alec said more to himself than to Cindy  
  
"She is your friend Alec" OC gently  
  
"Don't make me laugh Cindy" Alec sneered, "Friends don't do what Max has done"  
  
"It wasn't you Alec, she felt guilty because of Logan" OC trying to get Alec to listen  
  
"She's Loved Logan for forever, and she couldn't handle that she wanted another man"  
  
"That didn't give her the right to do what she did" He shot back  
  
"Alec I know, she was wrong and she knew that it was wrong, but"  
  
"But what, she couldn't help herself" Alec continued "I think she found it quiet easy to make me feel like shit"  
  
"Alec doesn't have feelings, I don't care about anyone" Alec hesitated "look Cindy I know your trying to help but I'm not in the mood, I'll see ya later" as he turned around and walked off  
  
OC could see the hurt and anger Alec was feeling, as she started to realised the reason. Alec genuinely cared about Max and that only seem to make the whole situation even more depressing.  
  
TBC  
  
Sorry for any mistakes, feeling tired but I really want to post…  
  
Keep reviewing please  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
4 


	10. BANG - Penny Dropped

1 Changes – Ch 10  
  
BANG - Penny Dropped  
  
Max had laid a wake for hours, not wanting to go into work; she was too ashamed to see Alec. But Max had to do this, she had to face the music. She dragged herself out of bed, and slowly dressed. Max was about to head out the door, when OC called after her  
  
"Max, where you going so early"  
  
"I….I need to" Max hesitated  
  
"Boo, you should give Alec a couple of days" She said gently  
  
"You've seen him" Max looking up  
  
"Yeah" Cindy paused "you look tired" As she poured 2 cups of coffee  
  
"How was he" Max asked as she sat down  
  
"He's…hurting" There was no other way to say it  
  
"God, what have I done" Max said, putting her head in her hands.  
  
"Max, he's angry and hurt, he's going to need time"  
  
"But I have to tell him I'm sorry" Max getting up and heading to the door again  
  
"Boo, listen to me" Cindy shouted after her "He cared about you, don't you understand"  
  
"I know, but I can make this right" Max sounding more confident as she open the door to leave  
  
OC followed her and forced the door shut again  
  
"No you don't Boo" Cindy signed as turned to face Max  
  
Max stood there looking confused  
  
"Don't ya see" OC hesitated "Alec is sitting there believing that you felt so disgusted at the thought of wanting him, that it turned your friendship for him to hatred"  
  
"You turned your guilt in to anger and even hate whether that was your intention or not, and you throw it Alec's way every chance you got Boo" OC didn't like having to tell Max this, but she had to hear it  
  
"Do you understand now why you should let him be for a while?" Cindy said with a heavy heart  
  
Max slowly sat back down in a state of shock and took in what OC had just said, and for the first time it hit her as to why Alec was so angry and hurt. Max done all the OC had said and more to him, but had been to rapped up in herself to see.  
  
Cindy stood there watching her friend knowing that all she had said was sinking in. Just then Max got and walked in to her room and shut the door.  
  
By the time OC had dressed and was ready to leave, Max had still not come out of her room; she tapped on her door but got no reply.  
  
"Max you ok" OC not expecting to get and answer  
  
"I'll tell Normal that you not coming in today" OC paused "I'll pop by and check on you at lunch, ok?"  
  
"Max" Cindy worried now, pushing the door open, to find Max sitting on her bed just staring into space "Max you going be ok"  
  
Max just nodded  
  
"Do you want me to stay with you today Boo"  
  
Max just shook her head  
  
"I'll see you later" OC said, as she shut the door, not wanting to leave but knowing that Max needed to work this one out herself. As Cindy opened the front door to leave, she looked back at Max's closed door.  
  
Max didn't hear the front door close; she didn't hear anything expect Zach's heart beating inside you her chest…  
  
I know it's short, but I have only just got my Pc back up and running today after been broken for 2 weeks… I will be able to spend more time this weekend on the up coming events. Still trying to get over the shock of DA Being cancelled, I am so upset but I will be mailing and post carding like a mad woman to the Fox network. Please review if you can.  
  
Thanks WooHoo 


	11. Truth Hurts

1 Changes – Ch 10  
  
  
  
Truth Hurts  
  
  
  
When Alec walked away from OC he had headed straight to Crash, as he walked down the stairs he spotted Sketchy at the bar. Alec walked over and sat down beside him.  
  
"Hey man" Sketchy said patting Alec on the back  
  
"Hey" Alec replied, sounding pissed off  
  
"I know what you need man, a stiff drink" Sketchy said as he caught the attention of the barmen  
  
"Two double whiskeys over here" Sketchy looked at Alec and continued "and keep them coming pal"  
  
"Thanks man" Alec said as the bartender placed the drink in front of him, which he picked up and downed  
  
"Now that's more like it, you ain't been yourself lately with all this arguing with Max" Sketchy said as he downed his drink and banged his hand on the bar top a couple of times as the burning sensation of the whiskey moved down his throat to his stomach  
  
"Woh, that hit the spot, 2 more my good man" Sketchy said  
  
"Alec what you have to understand is, that woman are complicated creatures, and well… Max isn't like other women so you haven't got a chance in hell of working out what her problem is. So I say forget it, forget her and partake in a night of drunken fun and honey hunting"  
  
Alec looked up Sketchy and burst out laughing, Sketchy was making more sense than he would ever know.  
  
"You know what man, that sounds just what the doctor ordered" Alec smiling as he picked up his drink.  
  
"To drunken fun and honey hunting" Alec said as he raised his glass  
  
"To drunken fun and honey hunting" Sketchy repeated as they picked up the drinks and downed them, slamming the empty glasses back down on the bar.  
  
For the next couple of hours Alec & Sketchy drank, played pool and flirted with the many honeys that appeared to be in Crash that night. Alec had decided from the moment he had walked away from Cindy, that he would not think about Max and all that had happened, he had been hurt twice in his life and would not allow it to happen a third time.  
  
By the time Crash was closing the only two customers left was Alec & a Very drunk Sketchy  
  
"I love ya man, your like my best friend" Sketchy said slurring his words  
  
"This, this was the best night I've had out in ages" Sketchy expressed the word ages by waving his arms about  
  
"Hey me too" Said Alec, who was a little drunk himself  
  
"You know this is what life is about, partying with you buddies, enjoying life" Alec said, not noticing that Sketchy now had his head on the table and was falling a sleep  
  
"You've been lucky man having all this, for all your life…. serious man, lucky" Alec finishing his drink and noticing Sketchy  
  
"Hey wake up" shaking him  
  
Sketchy shot up in the chair "Yeah" as he started to fall to one side, Alec being drunk, he was still able to stop him from falling on his face.  
  
"That's time to call it night" Alec said as he finished Sketchy's drink too  
  
Alec lifted sketchy up off the chair and put him over his shoulder. Alec staggered to the stairs holding on to the railing  
  
"Man, what have I done to myself" Alec said to himself "I'm loaded" laughing at himself now  
  
Once outside, Alec headed to a taxi rank, opening a door of a cab and throwing Sketchy in the back and then himself. Waking the cab driver in the front seat  
  
"411 Carters Avenue, my good man" Alec said as he laid back in the seat  
  
Alec closed his eyes and smiled to himself, he had a good time tonight. Sketchy was a good friend, a simple friend, Alec wished he could tell him the truth sometimes but he knew that was not an option. Max drifted into his thoughts and Alec actually felt a physical pain at the thought of her, the one person that he should have been able to trust. Luckily the cab pulled up outside of Sketchy's place and gave Alec something to do.  
  
"Hey man give me a minute to get him in doors" Alec telling the guy rather than asking him. Once Sketch was inside, Alec jumped back in the cab and headed home to Joshua's.  
  
Ten minutes later he was paying the cab driver and heading up the stairs to the front door, still having to hold on to the rails. Alec staggered into the front room where Joshua was still up painting, and went straight to the half bottle of whiskey that he had left.  
  
"Alec you ok" Joshua looking confused  
  
"Never better my friend, never better" Alec replied as he poured himself a drink "Join me in drink"  
  
"No thanks, Max says I shouldn't touch that stuff," Joshua said  
  
Alec flinched at the mention of her name, which didn't go unnoticed to Joshua. He watched Alec stagger back to the sofa and drop himself down. Joshua could tell that something had happen and knew it wasn't good.  
  
"What's the matter Alec" Joshua said as he went back to his painting  
  
"Why would anything be the matter, I'm on top of the world" Alec replied as he took a mouthful of his drink  
  
"You are drunk" Joshua paused "But you don't look happy"  
  
"I had an eye opening experience today my friend" Alec said while leaning back into the sofa  
  
"What was that" Joshua had a bad feeling about this  
  
"I found out who my real friends are" Alec smiled, but it was a sad smile.  
  
"Your my friend aren't you" Alec said as he got up, headed over and hugged Josh, patting him on the back  
  
"A good friend…. a good friend" Alec said pointing at Joshua. Alec turned around and headed back to pour another drink.  
  
"Cos you know I'm got a bad person, you understand me" Alec continued, "You were there, you saw what it was like"  
  
"Yes" Joshua quietly  
  
"It's been hard you know…getting used to the outside world"  
  
Joshua looked at the floor; it had been harder for him. Alec realised what he had said.  
  
"Oh man, Josh I'm sorry" Alec moved to put his hand on his friends shoulder  
  
"You've had it harder than all of us" Alec said with sincerity in his voice.  
  
"I just meant…..who knows what I meant"  
  
Alec grabbed the bottle and headed back to the sofa  
  
"Something has happen" Josh paused "Something with Max"  
  
"Well you could say that" Alec smirked "You could say that indeed"  
  
"What, you fight again"  
  
"More than that, much, much more" Alec said, anger starting to appear in his voice  
  
"What do you mean" Joshua sounding concerned  
  
"I mean, that Max and I are no longer friends, associates, or anything else that might relate to us having any relationship" Alec full of sarcasm  
  
"I don't understand" Joshua innocently  
  
"The only thing to understand is that, Max & me are finished" Alec snapped  
  
"She was meant to be my friend, and she proved today that she isn't and never was" Alec with pain in his voice  
  
"Max is your friend Alec" Joshua trying to defend Max  
  
"NO Joshua she isn't, she is disgusted by the actual thought of me" Alec continued with hurt in his voice  
  
"She's treated me like shit because she wants me" Alec spat "Because she wants me" he laughed as he downed his drink  
  
"I don't understand" Joshua replied  
  
"Oh, but I understand Joshua, I understand that Max had feelings for me. But the thought of her wanting me, made her turn on me….turn on me because the thought disgusted her so much" Alec through gritted teeth  
  
"Max said this to you" Joshua sounding shocked  
  
"Why else would she treat me like that?" Alec shouted "You don't want someone and then treat him like shit because you're trying to get his attention"  
  
"She said it was because she felt guilty for having feels for me, because she loved it Logan" Alec said sarcastically  
  
"Maybe she was telling the truth" Joshua said gently  
  
"I disgust her, she looks at me and see's what she used to be" Alec said with hurt  
  
"I cared for her Josh, more than I think I knew until today" Alec hesitated "I would have died for her, she was my saviour, my friend"  
  
"She can still be your friend" Joshua trying to help  
  
"No Josh she can't, she wouldn't do that to a true friend……to you" Alec staring at his now empty glass, he grabbed and poured the last of the whiskey into it.  
  
Josh stood there and watched his friend drinking in silence. Joshua couldn't believe that Max had treated Alec that way, because she felt disgusted by him. But he could believe that Max had feelings for Alec, Joshua had always sensed chemistry between them but put it aside because of her love for Logan. He could also understand her feeling guilty over it and her reaction to take it out on Alec, even though it was wrong and not Alec's fault.  
  
"Alec I think" But Josh was cut off  
  
"Joshua I am telling you the same as I told Max, I want nothing more to do with her, EO or anything else to do with her" Alec snapped  
  
"I am to do with her" Joshua sounding hurt  
  
"No buddy I didn't mean you, this has nothing to do with you and me, understand" Alec looking at Joshua  
  
"Understand, but Max will always be welcome here"  
  
"I know…..that's why I'm heading back to my place tomorrow" Alec replied  
  
"Oh" Joshua quietly  
  
"It's for the best Josh, Max is your friend and I don't want you to be in middle" Alec gently  
  
"But I wouldn't get in the middle" Joshua not wanting Alec to leave but understanding why  
  
"I'll miss you"  
  
"I'll still come and see you Josh, I promise" Alec smiled  
  
"I know" Joshua replied, still a little sad  
  
"But You and Max"  
  
"There is no me & Max anymore, there never was," Alec trying not to sound hard  
  
"You still care for her" Joshua pushing  
  
"What do you want me to say" Alec paused "yes I still care for her, but that's not going to change what has happen, or how she treated me" Alec snapped  
  
"I'm going to bed Josh, I'll see you before I go tomorrow" Alec said as he got up and walked unsteadily out of the door to his bedroom.  
  
Joshua watched as his friend left and he now understood how much Alec cared for Max and how much she had hurt him. He hoped he would see Max tomorrow and listen to her side of the story, that's if she would even want to talk about it.  
  
Alec stumbled into his room and fell on to his bed, as he laid there the room started to spin. Alec groaned and rolled on to his side, he closed his eyes and as he started to drift off to sleep he moaned  
  
"Max"  
  
  
  
TBC – I am not sure about this chapter I had really trouble putting it together. Let me know what you think, depending on the reviews I might change it.  
  
Thanks again for all the feedback. 


	12. Alone

Changes – Chapter 12  
  
Alone  
  
  
  
Alec stirred in his bed and let out a pitiful groan as he opened his eyes, the throbbing in his head increased by the bright sunlight that was pouring through his window. He slowly made a move to sit up, which only added to the throbbing in his head.  
  
"Jesus Christ" Alec moaned  
  
He lay there looking at the ceiling, not wanting to move, he felt like hell. Alec knew that his transgenic healing powers would kick in at some point; he just wished it would happen sooner rather than later.  
  
After what seemed like ages Alec was able to lift his body off of the bed and he slowly walked into the bathroom and turned on the shower. Pulling off the clothes that he had worn the night before, Alec stepped into the cold shower, as he did, he let out a scream from the shock of the water hitting his already tender body.  
  
Joshua had heard the shower running and knew Alec was up, so when he heard a scream he wasn't surprised.  
  
"Alec trying to wake up, shouldn't drink so much" Joshua said to himself  
  
Joshua started to prepare pancakes for breakfast and by time the batter was mixed and he had cooked the last one, Alec had appeared in the kitchen.  
  
"How are you feeling" Joshua asked  
  
"Starting to feel better, if you want the truth," Alec replied as he poured a cup of black coffee.  
  
"Was it worth it" Joshua said without looking at him  
  
"I think so?" Alec smiled while rubbing one of his temples  
  
"Want a pancake?" As Joshua held out a plate  
  
"Yeah why not, it will help with a quick recovery,"  
  
They sat down at the kitchen table and ate in silence, with each bit of food Alec was starting to feel better.  
  
Joshua spoke first "You still leaving today?"  
  
Alec looked up remembering the night events, including their conversation.  
  
"Yeah" Alec replied, "I think it's for the best, hey I'm just cramping you style by staying here" Alec smiled half-heartedly  
  
Joshua looked down at his half eaten pancake. He would miss Alec; it had been good to have someone around but he had always known he would leave in the end.  
  
"What about Max" Joshua asking, hoping Alec felt different in the light of day  
  
Alec dropped his fork on his plate with a crash, and he looked up and stared at Josh.  
  
"We had this conversation last night, I will not repeat it again" Alec continued "And If I have to, then we wont be friends anymore" Alec picking up his fork to eat again but found that he wasn't hunger anymore.  
  
"I'm going upstairs to pack my stuff" Alec said as he got up from the table and headed out of the kitchen  
  
Joshua sat back in his chair and sighed, he knew Alec had made up his mind that Max was no longer a part of his life. Josh started to clear the table and his mind wondered to Max, hoping she was ok.  
  
"Josh" Alec breaking Joshua's thoughts  
  
"I'm going to dash…..look thanks for everything" Alec Hesitating "I want us to always be friends, I hope you want that too"  
  
"Yes, I want that" Joshua looking at Alec  
  
"I'll pass by in a day or two, ok" Alec turned to leave then stopped  
  
"Promise you'll stay low, don't put yourself at risk" Alec with concern in his voice  
  
"Promise, be cool Alec" Joshua replied  
  
"I'm always cool" Alec turned and smiled at Joshua then left  
  
As the front shut, Joshua sat back down on the chair and looked around at the now empty kitchen, the now empty house and let out a deep sigh of sadness.  
  
~ ~ ~  
  
  
  
Alec walked into Jam Pony and headed for his locker. Sketchy was sitting on the bench looking the worse for their night out, his head in his hands.  
  
"Hey buddy, great night" Alec greeted him with a heavy pat on his back  
  
Sketchy let out a big groan, and looked up through the dark sunglasses that he had on.  
  
"Careful man, I'm a bit on the delicate side today" Sketchy putting his head back in his hands  
  
"Sorry Sketch, but you have to admit that was a rocking night out" Alec laughed  
  
"Don't you even feel a but worse for wear" Sketchy without looking up  
  
"I feel fantastic, not even work could piss me off today" Alec replied  
  
"You need to learn, when to say No Sketch" Alec laughed  
  
"Stop with the good mood will ya, have some consideration for others" Sketchy looking up  
  
"How do you do it man, you drunk more than me and here you are standing there like ya went to bed at 8 clock" Sketchy, shaking his head then deciding that wasn't a good idea, as he grabbed his head.  
  
"I can handle my drink my friend" Alec smiled  
  
"Now to work, come on get up, you'll feel better," Alec said as he pulled Sketchy up. Sketchy stood there and swayed for a few moments before falling back down on the seat.  
  
"Useless" Alec laughed and turned to open his locker, when OC walked up to him  
  
"Hey Alec, got a minute"  
  
"I've always got a minute for you" Alec's tone changed slightly  
  
"I need to speak to about Max" Cindy sounding concerned  
  
Alec hind the flinch at her name, and turned to look at Cindy  
  
"Then we don't have anything to say" His tone now without feeling and the look in his eyes told Cindy not gone on.  
  
"Hey you missed a good night last night, Sketchy the man drank Crash dry" Alec smiled "He's feeling the worse for it this morning, ain't ya buddy" Alec laughing now  
  
Cindy watched Alec sit down, as he turned and starting joking with a few of the guy's about Sketchy. OC couldn't believe what she had just seen, she knew how hurt he was last night and now you wouldn't think anything was wrong. This was not the action of a man who had his friendship and trust throw back at him yesterday. Cindy Shook her head, these Manticore kids sure knew how to hind there feelings, hind them so dame deep that she wondered, if they would ever be able to find them again.  
  
"Hey Cindy, you cool" Alec looked up at her and smiled  
  
"I'm Cool Boo, I'll see ya later" Cindy walked to her bike and left.  
  
"Come on sketchy let's head out" Alec picking him back up and walking him to the counter for there pick up  
  
"What's wrong with him" Normal snapped  
  
"Nothing, that a good days work wouldn't fixed " Alec smiled  
  
"You should listen to him, he could teach you a few things on how to be a professional"  
  
Sketch just looked up at Normal and put his hand to his mouth as he started to heave.  
  
"TOILET, TOILET" Normal shouted at an already running Sketchy.  
  
"This is what I have to put up with, I'm surprised that I run such a well managed office" Normal said more to himself than Alec  
  
By the time Sketchy had finished throwing up, Alec had all their parcels ready to go.  
  
"I don't know how I'm going to make it through today" Sketchy to Alec  
  
"Hey man by lunch time I promise you, you will be glad I made you go, now come on" Alec said as he handed Sketch his bike  
  
"Yeah yeah"  
  
As Alec walked out of Jam Pony he noticed that Max was marked off as sick today. Alec started to think about what had happened yesterday with Max, and today with Joshua. Alec got on his bike and as he started to peddle, he let out a deep sigh of sadness.  
  
"Hey Alec, you alright" Sketchy looking at Alec  
  
Alec looking up with a big smile  
  
"I'm always alright"  
  
TBC – Reviews please, I know it seems like it's dragging a bit but It is getting there I promise…. 


	13. Sorry

Changes – Chapter 13  
  
Sorry  
  
OC had dropped by at lunch time as promised, only to find Max still sitting on the bed and still staring into nothing.  
  
"Boo, you ok" OC concerned now  
  
Max nodded, as Cindy sat down beside her.  
  
"Your not ok, let me get you something to eat" Getting up from the bed  
  
Max just shook her head, and continued to sit there with a vacant look on her face.  
  
"Max this isn't funny, please talk to me" Cindy was now eye level with Max.  
  
Max stared at her and smiled sadly "I just want some time, that's all" Max paused "I'm ok honest, you go back to work and I'll see you later" Max patted her friend's hand to reassure her.  
  
"Alright, but I'm not happy about this, shall I tell Normal that you won't be in tomorrow"  
  
"No, I'll be back tomorrow, But thanks anyway" Max replied emotion in her voice  
  
"Ok, I'll see ya later" OC leaned over and hugged her friend "It's going to alright, he just needs time to calm down"  
  
"No, it's never going to be ok, not after what I've have done" Max responded without looking up.  
  
"Boo I"  
  
"Please just leave it…. ok" Max beseeching her  
  
"Ok" Cindy gently turned and headed back to work  
  
Max continued to sit in the silence of her empty room for hours, going over things that had happen in her life, people that she had come into contact with.  
  
"Your poison to everyone you care about, 452" Max flinching at the flash back to Renfro. She was right; she was poison. Poison to anyone that she cared for or that cared for her…  
  
  
  
~ ~ ~ ~  
  
The next morning Max dragged herself out of bed, washed and changed for work. It was still very early and she didn't want to wake Cindy, well not yet anyway. When Cindy come home last night, Max had pretended to be asleep she was not up to talking.  
  
  
  
By the time Cindy got up, Max had the coffee on and some toast to go, though OC did notice that Max hadn't eaten a bit.  
  
"Feeling better today" Cindy looking up as she drank her coffee  
  
"Much" Max smiled, "LAIR" Max thought  
  
"Well I'd better get my cute ass ready, don't want to keep my public waiting" Cindy replied as she slide off the stool and into her room  
  
Half an hour later they were on their way to work, Max cycled in silence most of the way, only to reply to questions that was asked of her. Cindy was concerned how Max would react to seeing Alec; she just hoped it would happen without any incident. As Max pulled up outside Jam Pony, she took a deep breath before entering.  
  
"Nice of you to appear today missy" Normal shot at Max  
  
"Yeah, I'm sorry about yesterday I had this really nasty"  
  
"Not interested, as long as you know you're not getting paid for it" Normal not even looking at Max when he said it.  
  
"Ok" Max picking up her job sheet and walking off  
  
"No smart answers Missy miss, maybe you are ill" Normal feeling pleased with what he thought was a witty come back.  
  
"He is such an ass," Cindy said to Max  
  
"I heard that" Normal bellowed  
  
Cindy and Max laughed as they waked over to their lockers and started to pull out their bike stuff.  
  
When Sketchy walked over "Hey Maxi" Max shot around to face him, for a second, just a split second she thought it was Alec  
  
"Don't call me that" Max snapped  
  
"Sorry, Max" Sketchy a little hurt "I was just going to ask how you were, but I see you're not in the mood today so"  
  
"No I'm sorry Sketch, better, thanks for asking"  
  
"I can see you're a lot better today too" Cindy shot back at him  
  
"Huh" Max looking confused  
  
"Yeah, I never got to tell you last night, cos you was a sleep and all!" Cindy said with a raised eyebrow "Sketch was very worse for wear yesterday, so bad he nearly throw up on Normal"  
  
"Oh my god" Max giggling, "What happened"?  
  
"Seems that Sketchy here decided to have a drinking competition and came in last"  
  
"See ya woman would say that, it was a boys night out" Sketch trying to defend himself "Anyway you try keeping up with Alec, it ain't easy"  
  
Max flinched at his name, and the smile now slowly disappeared from her face. Sketchy continued to chat not realising that Max no longer wanted to listen, as she sat down to put on her gear.  
  
"Then he beat me in 5 games of pool and got 3 different honeys digits, the mans a god I tell ya" Sketchy laughed, so did Cindy until she notice the look on Max's face  
  
OC sat down beside her and squeezed her arm; to let her know it's was cool.  
  
"And here comes the man himself" Sketchy laughed  
  
Max couldn't help it; she looked up at the now approaching Alec. She searched his face for a sign, any indication of how he would react towards her. She didn't have to wait long; the lack of emotion on his face was enough to tell her what she wanted to know. When he walk straight past her to his locker, opened it and grabbed his stuff and left, it just confirmed it. Max felt her heart sink, if she was honest, she had hoped that Alec would be ok with her, that he wouldn't be angry and hurt any more.  
  
Cindy and Sketchy both looked at Alec and then at Max, and then each other. Sketchy went to say something but Cindy shook her head.  
  
"Suppose I'd better get going, see you guy's later" Sketchy walking over to Alec, leaving Max sitting here  
  
"Max"  
  
"I didn't expect anything else, so just leave it" Max sadly as she got up to shut her locker….  
  
~ ~ ~  
  
"Hey what's with you and Max" Sketchy to Alec  
  
"Nothing" Alec Snapped  
  
"It don't look" Alec interrupted Sketchy  
  
"Just leave it, will ya"  
  
"Ok man, whatever ya say" Sketch paused "Crash tonight?"  
  
"I'm up for round two" Alec laughed as he slapped Sketch's back  
  
"Hey man, I swear you don't know your own strength" Sketchy rubbing his back  
  
"No I suppose I don't" Alec more to himself  
  
Alec and Sketchy were getting ready to pick up their packages, when Normal called him over.  
  
"I want you and Missy miss to do sector 7 again"  
  
"No" Alec replied  
  
"Oh very funny, here's the list of drop offs" Normal holding out the job sheet  
  
"I said No" Alec continued "You want sector 7 done, then I'll do it but I'm not doing it with HER" Alec's voice rose as he finished the sentence.  
  
"Well if you want to work here" Normal shot back.  
  
"Then fine, I quit" Alec replied through gritted teeth and turned to walk out.  
  
"Hold on there, let's not make a hastily decision now" Normal backing down on his last comment.  
  
"If you really want to be working at midnight finishing your runs, that's fine with me" Normal dryly  
  
Alec had not realised that most of Jam Pony were now staring at him, including Max. Normal noticed and shouted for everyone to get back to work.  
  
"Bip Bip people, times a wasting"  
  
Alec turned around to see Max's shocked and hurt expression on her face, and he flinched with guilt.  
  
"Shake if off Alec, you ain't in the wrong here" Alec said to himself  
  
Max snatched her jacket off the bench and rushed pass him, nearly knocking into Alec as she did. Once Max got out side she stopped to take a breath, her heart hurt, it actually hurt. Alec hated her so much that he would quit Jam Pony, just then she heard her name.  
  
"Max" Alec snapped, "I'm not in the wrong here" Alec feeling he had to explain himself  
  
Max turned to face him, Alec looked to the floor not wanting to look at her pale and tried face. Max spoke in a low voice so not to let anyone hear.  
  
"I can not even start to tell you how sorry I am, and I know that won't matter now, as you are willing to quit rather than have to work with me" Max continued "I never meant to hurt you the way I have, I've been a selfish child in my behaviour towards you"  
  
"Max I don't want to hear it" Alec sneered as he turned to leave  
  
Before Alec knew what was happening Max had kicked his legs from under him and he was lying on the floor and Max had leg locked him there with no way to get way.  
  
"What the fuck" Alec wasn't allowed to finish  
  
"You will listen to me" Max snapped, "let me have my say, then I'll leave"  
  
"I realise what I've done, I also realised what I have lost by doing it" Max paused "Alec I never understood how much our friendship meant until it was gone"  
  
"I failed you, I was able to dismiss you and your trust because I was scared and confused by my own feelings for you" Max sat back and let go of Alec  
  
"I've always loved Logan, I never loved anyone until I met him, when I started to get feelings for you I got scared, mad at myself for feeling like that" Max looking into Alec eyes. "So what do I do, I take it out on you, my guilt, my anger BUT not my disgust" Max not taking hear eyes off of him.  
  
"Are you sure it wasn't disgust Max, are you so sure" Alec snapped unable to help himself  
  
"I don't know what I can say to make you understand, it's not you it's me" Max stood up and walked a few paces back so Alec could stand up, as he did he brushed himself down  
  
"I'm poison Alec, I either kill or hurt the ones I care for, Ben, Zach, Logan and the virus and now you" Max looking down to the floor  
  
"Dose everything have to be about you Max, does it" Alec spate "I don't want to listen to this anymore"  
  
"Please before you go, believe me when I say I'm sorry" Max just wanted Alec to understand  
  
Alec turned and started to walk into jam Pony without answering Max  
  
"I'm sorry Alec" Max whispered again  
  
Alec heard Max but didn't turn around, his heart felt like someone had stuck their hand in his chest and was trying to rip it out, why couldn't he just forgive her, why couldn't he just stop being angry, why couldn't he just stop hurting….  
  
  
  
TBC – Reviews please, they help. I didn't find this chapter as hard as the last, wrote it at work (bad person) Thanks for all the feedback, keep it coming 


	14. Help

Changes – Chapter 14  
  
Help  
  
The events of 5 days ago were still the talk of Jam Pony, everyone guessing as to reason behind it.  
  
"I heard she dumped him," Sammy said  
  
"Oh my god, that's got to be it" Janet giggling "Oh how the mighty fall" Both laughed  
  
~ ~ ~  
  
"Hey, I heard he caught her in bed with another guy" Jono to Frank  
  
"No way, that's harsh man" Frank shaking his head "No wonder the guy is so pissed"  
  
~ ~ ~  
  
Even Normal had got in on the act. "I knew golden boy wouldn't put up with her crap much longer" Normal smirking  
  
"I heard she knocked him on his ass" Sketchy leaning over the counter so not let anyone hear  
  
"No no no, you've got it wrong, he knocked her on her ass" Normal smiled "Not that I agree with violence though" Correcting himself  
  
~ ~ ~  
  
Since the scene at Jam Pony, the atmosphere between Alec and Max had not changed. There would be a hushed silence in Jam Pony whenever the two of them were in the room together. Max was finding it harder and harder to cope; thought she wouldn't admit it to anyone, just giving her usually reply  
  
"I'm fine, stop asking"  
  
Max had also given up on sleeping, she was having disturbing dreams, in which she found herself in a fog that she was unable to escape from it, her feeling of fear, abandonment and loneliness, would lead to her waking in a veil of sweat and panic. Her appetite was next to nothing; she was starting to look and feel ill. Cindy and Joshua were going out of their minds with worry, even to the point of trying to speak to Alec again, but to no avail. Max was carrying enough guilt around for the population of China, over Alec and over everyone that she felt she had hurt in her life, and it was slowly destroying her.  
  
She had no interest in anything or anyone; she visited Joshua but mostly sat there in silence. Cindy forced her to go to Crash one night but she slipped out the back after she spotted Alec enter. Logan kept paging her but she neither had the interest or energy to try to explain what was going on, it would only lead to a long-winded talk then to a fight. So Max moved through each day in a dream like state, not caring about anything or anyone...  
  
~ ~ ~ ~  
  
  
  
Since the incident outside Jam Pony, Alec had walked away feeling guilty but he wouldn't back down, he was in the right dame it!!!! But that was before he noticed the change in Max over the following days; she was quiet, distance to her friends, she was pale, tired and losing weight. Then the guilt trip started to set in; this only made Alec angrier, angry with himself and with Max. Joshua and Cindy both tried to speak to him about Max and their concerns but Alec made it clear he wasn't interested.  
  
"I don't understand, she is sorry," Joshua snapped at him  
  
"It's not that simple buddy" Alec replied  
  
Max may not have known it but Alec had spotted her leaving Crash one night when she had seen him come in, he felt a tinge of sadness. Why was she reacting this way, for god sake he never wanted her to give up life? Why didn't she come over and punch him in the mouth, he could understand that, but not the way she was now. He would watch her at Jam Pony just sitting on the bench staring into nothing, often he would even she her flinch as if a memory had just slapped her in the face and maybe it had.  
  
  
  
The sixth night after their famous fight Alec was leaving work, when he looked behind him. He saw Max sitting alone on the bench waiting for everyone to go before she would then change and leave. He didn't want to care about her but he still did, it pained him to see the Max who he met in Manticore as his breeding partner, behave like a person that didn't care about life anymore.  
  
Alec headed for Crash to get Max out of his mind, but when that didn't work and he headed home with a bottle of black market whiskey, and settled in for a night of TV.  
  
Sitting in the darkness watching the shadows from the TV on the walls, Alec felt lost. It was like he had lost a part of him, Alec had believed had could carry on his life without Max being apart of it. To work in the same place, have the same friends but this wasn't going to work, by being around it was only making both of them miserable. Maybe it was time to leave, time to start a fresh somewhere; if he wasn't so hurt maybe he could forgive her, but that nagging feeling that she was disgusted by him still kept coming back.  
  
Alec got up and headed for bed, his head swimming slight from the whiskey. As he lay down he closed his eyes, he just wanted to sleep…  
  
~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Alec couldn't see anything but the fog that was all around him; it was so heavy that he had to bring his hand close to his face to see it. He slowly started to move forward, all his senses on high alert. Alec turned around suddenly as something or someone run by him.  
  
"Who's there" Alec calling out  
  
Then it run pass him again but closer, he could sense fear and panic from it. Alec moved forward slowly, hands reaching out in a defensive pose.  
  
He then made out the outline of what appeared to a person.  
  
"Hey, I'm not going to hurt you" Alec called out  
  
The figure rushed passed him whimpering. All the emotions that was oozing from this person was engulfing Alec, he could actually feel what this person was feeling. The feelings of panic, fear, sadness, guilt and loneliness was to much for him, he could feel his stomach start to tighten and with that, the feeling of sick raising up into his throat. He saw the figure stop abruptly and then slowly slip into a ball on the floor, Alec moved closer and with every forward step the emotions became stronger. He wanted to back away, his senses unable to take the sensations anymore, but something was forcing him forward, something that wanted him to see who this person was. He saw a girl sitting on the floor rocking back and forth, the sounds of sobbing was deafening to his ears, yet he still couldn't pull away, he felt trapped. Alec was standing over her now, he could not make out the colour of her hair, and it was like the whole picture was grey. He watched as she cradled herself for comfort, the feeling of abandonment coming from her was heartrending. As Alec slowly reached his hand out to stroke the girl's head, he had a powerful feeling of wanting to help her, help her get out of this place, then she suddenly looked up. The look of pure pain in her face made Alec jump back in shock….  
  
"MAX" Alec cried out, as he shot up in bed 


	15. Time To Heal

Chapter 15  
  
Time to Heal  
  
Alec sat on the side of his bed still overcome from the reality of the dream that had just woken him, he took a deep breath got up and walked to the bathroom to splash water on to his face. The dream or nightmare had shaken him, and he still had a sick feeling in the bottom of his stomach, he headed to the kitchen and opened the fridge to find it lacking of anything and proceeded to pour a glass of whiskey. He gave up on the idea of going back to sleep and headed for the sofa, Alec knew it was only a dream but it had disturbed him. The person in the dream was not Max or not the Max that he knew but then she hadn't been acting like that person since their first fight. Alec shook his head as if to remove the imagine, his only bit of peace was sleep and she had now taken that too, this was getting to much and something had to change…  
  
~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Max woke in a sweat and cursed for even trying to attempt sleep, but with the lack of it lately she was desperate for rest. Max rolled over on to her side, the same dream was plaguing her, and its intensity hadn't changed but this time there was something else, there was a presence, a person this time. Max felt they were not there to hurt her but to help her. The person was male Max had somehow sensed that, but she could not make out a face, she could make out the feeling of love from them. Max turned to look at the ceiling and contemplated, she and Logan had shared a dream once, the man in her dream had to be Logan; he was the one trying to help her. Max continued to stare at the ceiling, shouldn't she be happy about that......  
  
  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
  
  
Alec walked straight in to Cindy as he entered Jam Pony, he had drifted back to sleep for an hour but it was enough to make him late.  
  
"Sorry" Alec grabbing her so she wouldn't fall  
  
"Good morning to you too" Cindy pulling herself away from him, she was still pissed at him over the whole Max situation. Even though she understood his side, Max was her friend and she was suffering and Alec could put a stop to it and he wouldn't, men and their dame egos.  
  
"So you been alright" Alec looking around Jam Pony as he asked her  
  
"Yeah" Cindy noticing that Alec appeared to be looking for someone "You"  
  
"Yeah, you know me, I'm always alright" Alec smiled, looking at her now.  
  
"So everything is alright" Alec asking again, while he started to scan the room once more.  
  
"Like I said, yeah" Cindy was now on full alert  
  
"Well…that's good, we….er should go for a drink one night, catch up" Alec said as he moved backwards to his locker  
  
"Yeah, whatever Boo" Cindy replied with one eyebrow raised, was Alec looking for Max.  
  
"Great" Alec not really listening as he turned and headed for his locker  
  
Alec opened it and pulled out his bike gear, he was still looking around to see it he could see Max, but she would be well gone by now. He knew her routine; she was first in and last out lately. He just wanted to see her, not to talk to her but to see if she was ok, the dream still playing on his mind. He walked over to the counter to pick up his job sheet and packages for the day.  
  
"Your late, don't let it happen to often" Normal even snapper than usual  
  
"Yeah, bike trouble" Alec not in the mood either  
  
"Well your unlucky, I have had a list of jobs from one of our big clients" Normal said as he handed Alec the additional list of jobs to cover  
  
"What…this is going to take me all day," Alec groaned  
  
"Next time, don't be late" Normal snapped back  
  
This was all he needed, he was tired and now he had enough runs to see him through to 7pm, he picked up his bike and headed out on the first of his runs.  
  
Max was heading back to pick up more packages when she saw Alec coming out of Jam Pony not looking very happy; she ducked behind a parked van to avoid bumping into him. It hurt when he didn't acknowledge her, and she didn't need or want anymore hurt. As he drove pass she sighed and lent against the van, she missed him, the way he was always around, his non-stop talking, and the way he made her laugh, the way he was her friend. Why hadn't she noticed all this when she had the chance, now she could only notice these things from afar, like the way he looked tired. Just seeing him made her heart hurt, knowing that she had hurt him so much and that he had actually cared for her made it worse. Max walked her bike in to Jam Pony and picked up her next lot of jobs, she liked to get in early and leave late, it was a way to keep her busy and also avoid seeing Alec. After her dream last night she thought about dropping by after work and seeing Logan, maybe that's what her dream was telling her, but she would find it hard with all the questions he would have, maybe she would think on it some more before making her decision to go or not..  
  
~ ~ ~ ~  
  
  
  
Alec's day slowly got worse; it didn't matter how many packages he delivered, the customers just wanted to make his life harder that day and Max would continue to drift into his thoughts. As he delivered his last package, Alec just wanted to go home and lie in a hot bath for hours and sleep but that was not going to happen until he dropped off his signatures to Normal. Alec checked his watch, seeing it was 7:30 he picked up speed as he headed back to Jam Pony. Alec cycled straight up to the counter and to Normal, and dropped down his job sheet as he got off his bike.  
  
"Your cutting it fine" Normal said as he checked his watch  
  
"Somewhere to be Normal" Alec unable to keep the sarcasm out of his voice  
  
"It might come as a surprise to all of you, but I do have a life outside of this place" Normal snapped at Alec. "Just hurry up so I can lock up" he added as he walked away from the counter  
  
Alec walked slowly over to his locker and that was when he noticed Max sitting on the bench opposite her locker, staring in deep thought. He couldn't take his eyes off of her, she seemed so lost, child- like even, and he felt like he was intruding by watching her. His thoughts were broken when Max let out a deep sigh, he watch as her body seemed to struggled with it as if it was heavy, like she was carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders.  
  
Alec sat down next to her, Max looked up at him as he did, he reached his hand out and gently pushed her hair away from her face. Max started to cry at his touch, as she did Alec pulled her close and held her as she laid her head on his lap and sobbed.  
  
Normal watched the scene between them, he knew not to interrupt and was even touched by it, when Alec looked over he made a movement to let him know to lock up after they were finished, Normal looked back once more before leaving.  
  
For the next couple of hours Alec held Max in his arms as she cried, he gently stroked her hair, no words passed between them, and none was needed at that time….  
  
  
  
I know where I am going with this but I am not sure whether I have put it across right. Please review, it does help. Sorry it has taken so long but loads happening my end lately, thanks for all the reviews that you guys keep giving. 


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